Easy and Appealing Reward Systems to Motivate Any ADHD Children

Beth Skaret
Jan 16, 2019
6 min read

Updated: Jul 7, 2025

Many families struggle to find a reward system that motivates their ADHD children to do everyday tasks like chores, homework, or even basic self care.

Some think people feel like offering incentives to do what is expected is too much like bribery.

Some people willingly try lots of different things but have little success.

Why is that?

In this post we will talk about:

why kids with ADHD need incentives in the form of a reward system to motivate them to get things done.
how to set up a reward system
how to decide what kinds of incentives to use with your ADHD child.

Why Children with ADHD Need a Reward System to Motivate Them.

Kids with ADHD inattentive &/or combined type struggle to stay focused on tasks, complete tasks, stay organized, and are easily distracted.

Kids with ADHD hyperactive / impulsive types tend to struggle with controlling their behavior. They have trouble sitting still, move around, fidget, blurt out answers and interrupt frequently during class.

They don’t behave this way out of willful disobedience…

They lack the right balance of chemicals in their brains to focus and work without effort.

It is actually A LOT of HARD WORK for them to get some basic tasks done.

Imagine the subject or the activity you had to do when you were in school that gave you the most difficulty…

you know..the one that made you want to put your head through a wall…

Got it?

That is the level of frustration and difficulty that an ADHD kid is working with when trying to focus on a basic task like cleaning their room or working on a workbook page.

For that reason, they need EXTRA motivation to get things done.

They need to have a system that tells them,

“If you you do _____________, you will get ___________.”

And those blanks need to be very specific and consistent.

Some people struggle with this because they don’t want to bribe kids, but there is a difference between providing an incentive or reward and bribery.

A reward is like fulfillment of a contract.

It is planned.
Each person knows what has to be done and what will be given when the job is completed. It provides a reason to work that is motivating.
It is also planned in advance and
sets a pattern that can be repeated and tweaked with input from both parent and child.

A bribe is basically an act of desperation.

One person is clearly in control and refusing to cooperate so the person with no control has resorted to begging.
A bribe is not planned,
it is done impulsively and
usually does not work a second time without upping the ante.

Why can’t they be motivated by intrinsic rewards like good grades or praise? Why does it have to be a “reward?”

Dr. Russell Barkley,PHD (author of Taking Charge of ADHD), says that ADHD actually “disrupts their willpower, the intrinsic drive to achieve their goals.”

They don’t have the ability to focus attention on the value of the good grades or the words of affirmation that will come much later on down the road.

How to Set Up a Reward System that Motivates ADHD Children

Kids with ADHD need motivation that

provides frequent feedback (every 20-30 minutes)
includes an immediate reward / feedback.
is consistent
is part of an established routine (Beth W. Orenstein,
2016)

Setting up a reward system is kind of like creating a contract.

You need to define what your child has to do, the parameters in which it has to be done,

what the payment will be, how and when it will be delivered, and what penalty (if any) there will be if the contract is not fulfilled.

Step 1: Define what your child needs to do.

Write out some goals your child needs to accomplish.
(complete homework, clean room, get ready for school in the morning).
Make sure they are attainable (that they CAN actually do them).
Limit the list to 3-8 goals (3-5 for third grade and younger).
“Reward progress, not perfection.” (Cynthia Crossly -Habyts.com, 2016)

Step 2: Decide what the parameters will be.

When do each of the goals need to be accomplished
(before dinner, before the school bus arrives, by the end of the week).
There could be a quality parameter that is specifically defined
(clothes are put away in drawers, homework is done in best handwriting,etc).

Step 3: Decide what the payment will be.

The reward should be tangible, something they can hold in their hands or engage with immediately upon completion of the task. (see suggested incentives below).
It could be as simple as a sticker or stamp or as high value as a new toy or privilege.
It needs to be something that excites YOUR child specifically. If your child is not interested in the reward….the system will fail. Figure out what your kid will be willing to work for and use that as your reward.

Step 4: Decide how and when the reward will be delivered.

There should be an immediate and tangible reward for the completion of each goal.
If it is a daily goal, there should be a daily reward (small, but tangible - see below)
If it is a weekly goal, there should be a reward delivered immediately upon completion. - may or may not be tangible - varies by age and ability of child to wait for it.
You could also set up a delayed reward system using a chart where tokens are used to represent daily or weekly goals met and when they reach a certain level, the reward is delivered. (This should be reserved for BIG rewards & used only when kids can wait for the delayed gratification… it will backfire for many kids that are in need of immediate gratification, though you could use a combination of both options).
You could also use a type of currency system by assigning a monetary or point value to each goal. Completion of the goal earns money (use fake money / or real..up to you) or points which can be saved up or cashed in to earn rewards from a menu of items that are available. Assign higher values to rewards that are most motivating.

Step 5: Provide positive feedback every 20-30 minutes

Once your child starts working on a goal, set a timer to go off every 20-30 minutes (to remind YOU) and go check in with them.
Provide verbal feedback that is specific, positive and encouraging. Tell them how they are doing well (specific), what they are doing correctly (positive), and reminders that they are getting closer to earning the reward (encouraging).

Step 6: Be consistent.

Nothing will cause a reward system to fail faster than inconsistency.
Make sure you are working on the same goals consistently until they are mastered and have become a habit. Don’t change goals unless they are unattainable or are too easy.
Make sure that you are working to create a routine that your child can anticipate. When kids with ADHD experiences unexpected changes in routine, it throws them off and often sets them back a great deal. Keep it consistent.
Make sure you are consistently providing an immediate reward for goals met.

Decide What Kinds of Incentives or Rewards to Use to Motivate Your ADHD Children

There are unlimited types of incentives you can choose from to motivate your child. The important thing is to make sure it is something of VALUE to THEM. Listed below are some ideas to get you thinking. Include your child in picking out the rewards you use.

Bonus screen time* (use as BIG reward - note see post about screen time). Build an obstacle course Candy Choose a movie / tv show (control of remote) Choose a place to get take out food. Choose dinner Day off from chores Do a puzzle with you Download an App or game Earn extra responsibilities (in charge of something) Go out for ice cream Go to a movie with you. Go to a sporting event Have a sleepover or playdate iTunes money Play a game with you (board game or active) Read a book with you Stay up late Stickers Sweet beverage